Sandy Adelson Is the New Al Capone

Sandy Adelson tried valiantly to buy himself a president. He invested $150 million in presidential candidates, first Newt Gingrich and later Mitt Romney, only to see it all wasted.

Not Sandy Adelson. I know this because Al Capone was both better looking and a better person.

To some extent he lost the money the same way he got it, gambling. He put a shitload of chips on double zero (Newt) only to watch that political salamander crap out (I know I'm mixing my gambling metaphors). Then, like any addicted gambler, he doubled down his bets on Mitt and lost that too.

Of course, Sandy wasn't just placing bets, he was trying to purchase a president. See, Sandy Adelson is a crooked little SOB, up to his over-sized earlobes in bribery and money laundering allegations. Sandy wanted to own himself an Attorney General and the best way to do that is buy the president.

Since that didn't happen Sandy faces the possibility of spending the rest of his miserable little life hiring a phalanx of expensive lawyers to protect his ill-gotten gains from John Law on several continents. And, of course, Sandy will hit the political roulette tables again next presidential cycle gambling that his billions can elect some other corrupt politician, like Bobby Jindal, to the highest office.